I got a final bill from EDF Energy
I’m sure it was a crime.
They charged us hundreds of pounds
To live a peaceful life.

We called customer service
And asked them to explain…
But all we got was misfortune
And another letter of shame.

Now, me and the wife are no energy scientists
But we know how shit is made.
It shouldn’t cost one household
Thousands! to cook food and have a shave.

A magnet is turned
Which excites electrons
And this makes energy for all the UK.
But that doesn’t mean they need to charge a fortune, for firing electrons down a copper line.

They collect energy from the wind
They collect energy from our waste
They collect energy from the sun
And charge us what the like.

We even spoke to Ofcom
What a bunch of wasteful knights.
We sent a letter to the Government
And are still waiting for our legal rights.
We even spoke to the Establishment
Who laughed and said ‘fuckadoodle delights’.

But that’s the free country we live in.
What a bunch of thieving shites.

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